When my mom buys me surprises, I get scared. She means well, but it usually means that she has bought me another copy of "Ferris Bueller's Day Off." She has seriously given me this movie at least 3 times.

Last weekend I went home to visit, and she announced she had gotten me a little surprise DVD at the bargain bin at Walmart. I got prepared to say, "Cool! I wonder what kind of special features they put on the DVD version of Ferris!" No, sir. Mommy done good. She pulled out this evil black and orange satanic-looking DVD with Gene Simmons and Ozzy Osbourne on the cover called "Trick or Treat." Mom said, "This looked like something you would like."

The blurb on the back said:

"Eddie Weinbauer is a typical all-American teenager. At least he was until he fell under the evil spell of rock music. Now he's obsessed with his superstar idol Sammi Curr who is killed in a hotel fire. Eddie becomes the recipient of the only copy of Curr's unreleased album, which when played backwards, sends a message of destruction and as Halloween approaches, Eddie begins to realise this isn't only Rock 'n' Roll... it's life or death and he must draw the line to thwart this mission."

I knew this movie was going to be brilliant. Finally, last night I watched it. I was so jazzed up about it, and the opening 90 seconds did not disappoint. In fact, the opening 90 seconds had me on all fours in front of the TV, pounding on the floor with how awesome it was...it was just a shot panning around Eddie's bedroom, focusing on the following items:

• Sammi Curr heavy metal poster
• KISS heavy metal poster
• Anthrax heavy metal poster
• Twisted Sister heavy metal poster
• Ozzy heavy metal poster
• Small library of books that all had "rock" in the title
• Several strategically placed metal studded wrist cuffs
• A Def Leppard calendar to fucking die for

Okay, maybe you had to be there, but just when I thought it couldn't possibly get any better...the camera zoomed in on our Eddie Weinbauer. Oh my god.....IT WAS SKIPPY FROM FAMILY TIES!!!???!!!???!!!

That was only part A of several alphabet's worth of awesome details in this film, holy shit, you have to see this! The best part was the scene where this girl starts listening to a tape of music Eddie made, and the heavy metal literally rocks her clothes off. LITERALLY. Heavy metal (in the form of fluorescent green plasma) comes out of the headphones and proceeds to systematically remove all her clothing. Then right after heavy metal gets her panties off, heavy metal turns into a big gooey demon with a 4 foot long tongue and scares the girl so bad that it fries her brain, which leaks out her ears and all over the headphones.

There is a lot more I could go on and on about. Like when the bully (brilliantly played by the gay guy from Melrose Place) knocks Eddie down, he says: "Awww, did you bang your head, headbanger?" And the discourse between Eddie and "Nuke" (Gene Simmons) where Nuke gives Eddie the sacred "only copy in existence" record. Eddie wants to ensure that Nuke is okay with giving him the "only copy in existence" and Nuke replies: "Sure, it's okay. I made a copy on tape."

You really should see this movie. Netflix doesn't have it, oh my god, what if I have the ONLY COPY IN EXISTENCE????

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