I mentioned a few entries ago that I will soon be going to Vegas again. Tickets have been bought, purchased, and pocketed. But allow me to start from the beginning....

I don't e-mail my old buddies from Australia as often as I should. It just seems like it's better to wait until you have big news than write about all the boring day-to-day stuff. One of my friends down there is 1000% obsessed with tornadoes. Last summer, he got completely riled up and was planning a trip to Texas specifically to go tornado-chasing and try to get killed. I encouraged him to wait until spring, when tornadoes actually occur.

I haven't really talked to him since then.

But during the first few weeks of May throughout Tornado Alley this year, there were over 300 tornadoes and around 50 deaths. This seemed important enough to write and tell him that the season was at hand, and that he needed to get his ass over here.

He writes back, "Hey, Hales! I'll write you when I get back to Oz. I'm in Thailand right now travelling...WAIT A MINUTE!!!! I'm going to be coming back through Vegas in June...send me your details!!" etc. So naturally I write back telling him that he must call me the second he gets out of customs or better yet, let me meet him in Vegas! So, duh, I'm going!! And this is extra rad because this is the same guy who went to Vegas 3 or so years ago on his trip to the States....and he and his friend won TWELVE THOUSAND DOLLARS!!?!!!

It gets better...

He was being all super-nice and offering to share accommodation with me. Wait... Is that nice, or is he trying to get in my pants? Nevermind. He was being sweet about it saying that "most hotels in Vegas come with two beds, so we should be okay, and if not maybe I can get you drunk enough to snuggle into one with me." It was at that moment that I had the best idea and wrote to him:

"If it ends up being one bed, and we want to keep this all innocent, here's what we do...we get married! Then we can get divorced right before we leave! They have vending machines there for instant divorces. It'll be fine!"

Then he AGREED TO DO IT!?! And immediately he went and wrote everyone back in Oz that he and I are getting married in a few weeks! So apparently I have a fiancee! Whoops!

<<prev - next>>